My hand is shaking and my heart is pounding, the tears are rolling down my cheeks. I take a deep breath and let it out to help calm my shaking body. The scented lavender candle is not doing much to bring peace to my present existence.
At this very moment, I feel as if I’m stuck in the wax, flailing in the ocean water without a glimmer of light in sight. I know I won’t stay there long; my faith in God is too strong. But now, I’m being pulled back into the nastiness of the lies and deceit. Why?
Someone said to me the other day that “nice guys always finish last.” I didn’t agree with him. I told him to look at the positive things in every situation; look at the glass half full not half empty; learn from your pain.
I felt like that for a brief moment. Only briefly – I won’t let the ocean waves take me away. I’m too strong for that.
We all take a few steps back (Or recycle as Melodie Beatie would say) especially on the road to healing our pain. I guess today was my recycle day. I didn’t seek it nor want it. It was just thrown at me out of nowhere. God must be sending me a message or it’s the Devil just being him.
The sad thing is – I let this get to me. I am upset at myself for letting it try to sink me. BUT…
NOTHING WILL SINK ME!
NO ONE WILL SINK ME!
Healing the pain is a process. There are days we just have to fight for the peace and solace we so deserve. Keep swimming, keep dancing, keep smiling. The light is always there.
“I can do anything through Christ” That is what keeps me going. It will for you too!