Tag: trust

Patience!!

On By Kimberly Rae Gerodimos/MarxIn Life's journey1 Comment

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“Things come to us not when we want them, but when we are ready.”

Patience is a virtue…so they say.   I’m not sure that was passed down through my genetic makeup.  Oh, I suppose there is some swishing around in there somewhere.  It does come out now and then.  But today… it has taken a holiday, and I’m not sure when it’s returning.

I do my best each morning to wake up with a grateful heart, a smile on my face, and the motivation to make it a great day!!!  But today, and maybe a little yesterday… It seems to have escaped me.  I seem to be standing at a huge fork in the road.  My journey has stalled; taken a rest… I don’t know, but I’m stuck; frozen at a point in my life where I should be confident and moving forward.

My summer took me to places I didn’t think I would ever see.   I climbed the highest peak in Oahu.  I swam in the bluest water you have ever seen.  I tasted food beyond my wildest imagination… I was living and loving my life.  But…as wonderful as my trips were… I didn’t have anyone to share it with.  I wanted to be sitting on Sunset beach with that special person in my life.  I wanted to laugh and discover with them.  I wanted someone’s shoulder to lean on, on the long flight home.   After 5 years of being single, is God saying I am still not ready?? Does Karma really exist?  I keep asking myself if I have done something not to deserve a good man in my life.  I keep asking God, what else am I supposed to learn?

I’ve grown to love myself and to be happy with just me.  The scar I wear proudly from my last relationship… remains just that… a Scar.  It has healed over and I have moved forward.  I’m ready!!! So I think.

So what else God??  Are you still trying to teach me about patience?  I know I’ve stumbled a bit over the past 5 years, but I’m still here; wishing and wanting to share my life with the person you have waiting for me; or maybe there isn’t someone.  Maybe I am just supposed to embrace being single and that’s how it’s going to be.

So give me that little nudge. Push me in the right direction.  You may need to hold my hand at first, but I’ll keep moving forward, because I have never lost my faith in YOU.

As always… Keep hiking to the top!!!

Kimberly Rae

 

 

 

 

Single… Why????

On By Kimberly Rae Gerodimos/MarxIn Life's journeyLeave a comment

Why are so many of us still single? It doesn’t matter how old we are, how many times you have been married, we are single right now in this moment.  In my experience,  from people I have known and what has been done to me… I feel that people are not able to commit fully to one human being. They seem to have one foot in the relationship and one foot out. Because you know just maybe there could be somebody that might come along that appears to have greener grass than what you have in front of you. Really?? How about watering the grass that’s right in front of you.  how about nurturing that so that it can become all you  wanted it to be or could even imagine. When you can’t fully commit or work on the relationship that you’re in, then really is it going to go anywhere? I say no, it will eventually fizzle out.  one of you will end up cheating on the other, I know that all too well. I think it’s hard to find 2 people fully committed in a relationship. One usually is and the other is kinda halfway there,  as the other foot is dangling outside of the relationship.

Relationships take work. Whether you’re married or not, you are in a relationship with someone. You don’t have to be living with them but if you are dating and if you’ve dated for quite a while you are in a committed relationship. Sneaking around talking to other women on an intimate level is not being fully committed. If you can’t be that with the person you are with… then stop and think… reflect. am I in the right relationship?  How do I really feel about this person?   Or, what can I do to make this better?  I see so many relationships just thrown away because one or both people don’t want to take the time to work on it, to talk,  communicate.

I realize when you have been married to someone for a very long time or just even in a relationship with someone for a very long time, things can get stagnant. You get into a routine you do the same things all the time… that is when you need to change things up. You have to be able to recognize when your relationship is in that place. So change it up, go eat somewhere different, take a weekend road trip, do something you haven’t done in a long time.  think about what you did when you first met.  what made you happy, what was exciting. Bring more passion back into the bedroom. There are so many things you can do without dissolving the relationship, before you start  cheating on your partner that you supposedly still love but but yet you are looking for some other kind of excitement to keep you going. Find the excitement with the person you’re with now. And sometimes yes, relationships need to end but I still think as a society we do not put enough time and effort into the person that we are with. We let it go.  We just say, “oh there’s gotta be something better out there.”  Take the time working with what is right in front of you, because the grass is only greener where you water it. 

Don’t be the sprinkler that is watering a bunch of different plants. Be the hose that’s directly on the one in front of you,  and grow together :))

Keep hiking to the top,

Kimberly Rae

Just Friends

On By Kimberly Rae Gerodimos/MarxIn Life's journeyLeave a comment

The sweet smell of cinnamon and sugar engulf the small space I call my writing corner. I miss having an office.  The scent of a candle can bring back memories, brighten up a mood, or take you to another place where no one can find you.  I am going to another place.  In my mind anyway.

There are days I understand life and all that it gives and others where it just doesn’t make sense.  This is a “doesn’t make sense”  kind of day.

It was my birthday yesterday.  Even though I was overpowered with birthday wishes, there was one I didn’t get.  One I couldn’t or wasn’t allowed to get.

Why can’t men and women just be friends?  I have always had male friends; married, with a girlfriend, didn’t matter.  I had no romantic interest in them.  They were just great friends.  But society and insecure women don’t see it that way.  If they have someone in their life you can’t be talking with them.  WHY NOT???  I’m not trying to take them from who they have.  I would never do that.  I’ve been on the other of that.  It is so nice talking to a man.  They don’t judge you, criticize you, they say it like is and you don’t have to second guess them.  Amazing!!!

That pit in your stomach, the “I don’t feel like eating,”  the emptiness in your heart is all that I am feeling right now.  I had to give my friend up.  He can no longer talk to me, email me, or call me.  Society has deemed it isn’t right.  I have known him since college.  I know people come and go in our lives, but I will miss him.  I do miss him… and he misses me.   But I do understand. His happiness is more important to me.  I know we will always be friends in our hearts.

Always hiking to the top,

Kimberly Rae

Our Paths in Life

On By Kimberly Rae Gerodimos/MarxIn Life's journeyLeave a comment

The breeze is quiet as it catches a few strands of my long hair.  They wisp across my face; like the tickle of a soft feather as it brushes so gently over my face.  The birds are having their own social gathering as I sit peacefully in the old Green Adirondack chair.  The floor beneath my feet is damp from the rain, mixed with wood-chips, pine needles and remnants of hours of fun.

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I reflect upon my morning hike and parallel that journey with life…

The trail started out smooth; a gradual incline.  A 1300 foot elevation gain by the time I would make it to my destination. But nothing I couldn’t handle.  I stopped along the way to take in the beautiful surroundings.  I continued on, only to find myself on a rocky trail.  I had to watch my step.  My journey was beginning to be more challenging.  As I was adjusting to the new terrain – I came to a roadblock.  The large oak had fallen to its death, blocking the trail I was on.

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I had to make a choice, so I could keep moving forward.  At this point, I needed to tap into my patience, my faith, and my perseverance so I could make it over this hurdle without getting hurt.  I could have taken the easy way and made a path  around it.  But I decided I needed to take some risks and with that, the possibility of being hurt.  I had to start breaking down those walls.  I slowly rolled over the massive log and touched ground on the other side.  Not as hard as I thought:)  As I moved on, the terrain became very rocky.  But as I continued to take baby steps and appreciate my surroundings – my journey became manageable.  I soon found myself walking on smooth ground.

In life, we find ourselves somewhere on this trail.  We are all there at some point in our life.  How we move forward is a choice only we can make.  If we take the time, to make a choice, to make a change – the trail smooths out.

Where are you on your journey?

Keep Hiking to the top!!

Kimberly Rae

 

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Facing the Storm’s in Life

On By Kimberly Rae Gerodimos/MarxIn Life's journey2 Comments

Have you ever come to a point in your life when you knew something was missing?  You felt an emptiness, a void that you could not explain?

I can’t put my finger on any one thing, but my life is in limbo.  It is an unsettling place to be.  I trust God has a plan for me and I want to do what he feels is right for where I am in my life.

My interview for teaching in the middle east is this Wednesday.  The work getting to this point has been overwhelming at times and costly.  My passport went missing on Thursday.  It mysteriously vanished from my documents folder.  Not sure if someone took it or what happened.  I am just going to chalk it up to the nastiness (from someone I don’t even know) that has been plaguing me the past 2 years.  Because I can’t explain that either.  Onward and forward I move.  I have applied for an expedited passport at an ex-orbited amount of $400.00.  The paperwork and time involved in this is more than I had expected.  Again, doing my best to stay positive.

At this point I do not know what direction my life is going until I know if I am going to Abu Dhabi or not.  I know I have to move from my current place of residence either way.  So… do I pack to move out of the country and store my things, or do I pack to move to another apartment?

As I contemplate all of this, the question remains; what is missing in my life?  A new adventure?  A man (the right man) to share my life with?  A different job?   I don’t know.  I am kind of free falling right now, and I just have to trust that God will catch me when my new journey has revealed itself.

All I know is that my journey is going to take a new path.  Change has to happen for growth to take place.  I’m not afraid of change because I know God has my back.   So… I am going to head into the storm  and face what I have to in order to grow.

The story below is a good one and one I take out and read from time to time.  I found it again to today.  I think I was meant to find it:)  Maybe it will speak to you:)

“An old cowboy said he had learned life’s most important lessons from Hereford cows.  All his life he had worked cattle ranches where winter storms took a heavy toll among the herds.  Freezing rains whipped across the prairies.  Howling, bitter winds piled snow into enormous drifts.  Temperatures might drop quickly to below zero degrees. Flying ice cut into the flesh.  In this maelstrom of natures’ violence most cattle would turn their backs to the ice blasts and slowly drift downwind, mile upon mile.  Finally, intercepted by a boundary fence, they would pile up against the barrier and die by the scores.

“But the Herefords acted differently. Cattle of this breed would instinctively head into the windward end of the range.  There they would stand shoulder-to-shoulder facing the storm’s blast, heads down against its onslaught.

“‘You always found the Herefords alive and well, ‘ said the cowboy.  ‘I guess it’s the greatest lesson I ever learned on the prairies –just face life’s storms”

Similarly, if we face up to our individual adversities or hardships, they can become a source of blessing.  God will not give us adversities we cannot handle, and he will bless us richly for patiently doing the best we can in the circumstances.

Keep hiking to the top,

Kimberly Rae

 

Life… A Gift to Treasure

On By Kimberly Rae Gerodimos/MarxIn Life's journey1 Comment

I don’t have a degree in psychology, life coaching, or counseling. I am educated and have more than one degree. But the best degree I have is my degree in life. My life experiences are what I share to help others. I have often asked God why he has put me through so much in my life. Why have I had to suffer pain, loss, the struggle to survive; so I could be right where I am today; helping others understand where they are at and to help them take that first step towards living their life again.

As an educator, I strive to reach all my students, just like I hope I am reaching some of you. I know realistically I can’t reach everyone, not even in my classroom. But I keep reaching out and I know I have touched some.

I believe this is what God had planned for me. This is my purpose, why I’m here, and why he put me through the struggles in my life. As painful and heart wrenching as most of them were, it was all worth it to be here today helping those who are going through a rough time or just need someone to listen.

I sit here looking out my office window, and see a stream of water flowing by from all the rain that just won’t stop. My troubled mind a year ago would have said, “let’s take the Kayak out, jump on and see where it takes me.” I’m done running away from all that has hurt me. I stand strong with God who has strengthened me, ready to take on what life has in store; good or bad.

I say thank you, to all of you who have read my blogs, to those I have touched, and especially to those who have touched me. Whatever stage you are at in your life, keep moving forward and hurdle those obstacles. Don’t let anything stop you. As I told a special person in my life; Let go and Fly!

“If you find a path with no obstacles, it probably doesn’t lead anywhere.”

Keep hiking to the top!

Kimberly Rae

Trusting Again

On By Kimberly Rae Gerodimos/MarxIn Life's journeyLeave a comment

“You may be deceived if you trust too much but you will live in torment if you don’t trust enough” ~Frank Crane~

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I sit here perched high upon a desert rock, admiring the majestic mountain I have climbed many times.  It is one of the most beautiful formations that God has created.  This mountain, along with many others, was my savior as I was healing.

I am resting upon another vista today; having a little one-on-one time with God.

As I have moved past the hurt and pain, I find I am struggling to find a balance in the area of trust. It has been my pattern to trust too much and therefore, I have been deceived many times.  My trusting nature is often times taken advantage of.  I mean really, who wants to experience the pain of being deceived over and over?  Certainly not me.  I’m not sure If I could go through that again; or that I would want to.  So, there in lies the question: Do I continue to trust as I always have, or do I look at anyone new I meet with a questionable eye?

The latter really isn’t who I am, but I find that my red flag awareness is heightened after what I have been through.  I interrupt actions too deeply and feel as If I am being deceived; when maybe I am not.

I need to find my center here; a happy medium, if you will.  I trust God implicitly.  So I trust he will guide me on this journey.

From my experience, the worst deception is to deny what is going on around you or pretend that you’re okay. We can deceive ourselves so well that we really believe we are doing okay. When in reality, we are just existing.   Are any of you in that place?

The wind is picking up as it attempts to penetrate my many layers of clothing.  It is 39 degrees and holding.  But the air is crisp and the silence is golden.  Thank you Fr_ _ _for showing me how to take the time to be one with nature and with God.

I slowly stand and admire my view as I begin to make my decent.  Life in the desert can be pretty spectacular!

My keen sense of awareness may be heightened, but I choose to continue to trust all that I meet.  It is who I am.  God will handle the rest:)

Keep hiking to the top!

Kimberly Rae

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